As we continue to celebrate love during this Valentine’s Week on the blog, here is a tender clip from a movie that teaches about love:
I love the line in his vows that says, “I vow to fiercely love you, in all your forms.”
Anyone who has been in a relationship for just about any amount of time has learned that people do change in many ways. For those seasoned couples who have been together through decades, through health challenges, through childbirth or infertility, through loss and renewed love, this line may be particularly poignant.
In my own life, I have watched couples endure in love through physical changes. We lose hair. We gain wrinkles. When a woman undergoes the decision to have a child, her belly grows, her breasts become enlarged, and her form changes. When a baby is born, skin and tissue and stretch marks can change her form from what it once was. When a partner undergoes treatment for cancer, he or she loses hair, color, and can lose or gain weight. Love endures these changes.
When one or both partners are stressed or undergo the difficulties of life, they can experience emotional changes. Maybe they are not as stable as they once were. Still, love presses on through these challenges.
When we vow or promise or covenant to love each other through life and beyond, we stand by each other–in all our forms. I know my husband sees me at my best and at my worst. I took a long time to fully let him into my heart, misled by the screaming thought inside me that if he really knew me he wouldn’t want to be with me. Thankfully, I was wrong. And he has been faithful to me–in all my forms–over many years and many struggles. He continues to strengthen me, and I hope to do the same for him.
In the film The Vow (based on a true story), the main character suffers a brain injury where she doesn’t recall the past three years (years in which she brought about pivotal changes in her life and relationships–including relocation, changes in her studies/major, and her marriage). (SPOILER ALERT) As her husband tries to help her remember, she continues to struggle. She ends up going back to her old life that she remembers, leaving her husband alone. At the end of the film, she makes the same decisions on her own that she did years ago (leaving law studies to continue her work as an artist, moving from the suburbs back into Chicago). They meet again and the end credit song begins to play as the couple head out to eat at “someplace new.” The true story couple is then pictured with their two sons, and viewers are left to assume that they remarried and are now living happily.
I am touched by his determination to love her in the way she needed to be loved, to give her some space to heal without taking away his love. He truly lived up to his vow to love her in all her forms.